A recent fall out between two of my close friends, had me
questioning ‘the person I see when I am
with them, is that the ‘real them’?’
In a conversation with friend 1, I said about friend 2 that I find it
interesting that friend 2 knows everything about friend 1 and I, yet friend 1
and I don’t really know a lot about her.’
Friend 2 plays a role of being shy, innocent, naive and quite prudish.
Friend 1 and I are very similar in that we are quite extroverted in personality,
as well as share similar morals and values.
Despite friend 2 being quite introverted, in comparison to
friend 1 and I, friend 2 works as a Police officer, which holds a status in the
community of law enforcement and power.
I have witnessed the transformation of her personality from introvert
and naive, to confident, strong and outspoken, once she has put her uniform on
and on the job. Her whole appearance and
demeanour are at opposite ends of the spectrum, to when she is at work and when
she is not. As Goffman argues ‘we are
always wearing masks in order to make it to the highest point possible in the
social ladder’. He believes that the
mask is our truer self, the one that we really want to be.
Therefore, when friend 1 is at work (setting), she believes
she should be respected in the community putting on the front of authority, and
believes she has power because of her belief in the rules surrounding her
position. This then forms part of her
social setting (work/colleagues).
References
Goffman, E 1971, ‘Performances’, in The Presentation of Self in Everyday Life,
Hammondworth, Penguin, pp 28-82
